A Satire from an Anti-Religious Perspective vs. a Plea for Understanding

Hi, friends. It’s been a while since I wrote the first installment of Dueling Poems, so here is another one! Flexing the ol’ creative writing muscle feels refreshing.

Last time, I poked fun at righteously-indignant Christians for oftentimes being narrow-minded and unloving (which is antithetical to biblical Christianity tbh). Since I’ve proven that I can criticize “my own kind” and that I acknowledge how hurtful some Christians can be, I think I’ve earned a turn at flipping the tables and poking fun at a certain kind of anti-religious person.

Obligatory preface statements conveniently summed up in a hashtag: #notall

A Satire from an Anti-Religious Perspective

I don’t like people who believe in fairytales

I hate their churches, too

If I can’t wrap my mind around something

It can’t possibly be true

I’m quite the intellectual

I rightfully have an air of superiority

Listening to a deluded Jesus freak

Would require a little humility

I don’t have the patience for that

And I see no tragic irony

In judging and condemning a whole group

Though some of them pray for me

I’d rather sit behind a screen

And tear people down

From that hobby, I can’t tell you

How much joy I’ve found

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And what do the freaks do in the meantime?

Serve free meals to the community

Donate to charity

Give out food boxes at a pantry

Send cards to the lonely

Participate in prison ministry

Gather for worship, fellowship, and scripture studying

Spend time praying, meditating, self-reflecting, and repenting

Try to be more loving, caring, and forgiving

Subject their hearts to redemptive pruning

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I could go out and serve the world

Like these other Jesus freaks

But then who would be around

To complain about everything?

The church is just a tax scam

They should start paying immediately

But church and state need a wall of separation!

These ideas aren’t at all contradictory

I’ve heard that God is love

But I’ve met some hypocritical Christians

Therefore, it stands to reason…

Every single one is bad, end of discussion!

I’m not into a God of love, anyway

It’s more fun to be condescending and petty

I mean…perusing Twitter to start futile debates?

Pull out the confetti!

I don’t understand these people

And I don’t want to or even need to

I’m smart enough to know

Whatever I assume about them is true

A Plea for Understanding

I approach you delicately

Because you may likely speak from pain

Since I don’t know, I won’t try to convince you

That there is no reason for your disdain

I simply implore you to remember

Not to judge all forests from some trees

Look at the good we do in the world

Maybe you will come to see

The people who were fed by us, clothed by us, loved by us

What about their stories?

You claim to hate all organized religion,

But would you want those people to go hungry?

Please hear this plea for a fair hearing

See our flaws, but acknowledge the positive things we do

and I will try with all my heart

To give the same consideration (not stereotyping) to you

And there you have it! Reminder–writing a satire about a certain type of person does not indicate that I am stereotyping an entire group. In fact, stereotyping is a concept that’s condemned in these poems! Some Christians got their toes stepped on by my first installment, so it’s probably inevitable for some to feel offended this time, too. Also, I do realize that Christianity and religion aren’t synonymous, though the poems could imply that.

Thanks for reading! What do you think about the poems, religious people, anti-religious people, or organized religion? Let me know in the comments.